Big Mo
My candidacy for the Republican presidential nomination waxes. I have John McCain on the ropes. Absurdly, liberal blogger Tim F. of Balloon Juice sees my wake and takes it for a vacuum, announcing his own candidacy. Tim doesn’t even have his own blog – he has to use John Cole’s. And let’s face it, I was John Cole like three years before John Cole was. PWND! Plus, Tim F. fails to show the requisite enthusiasm for our President’s decision to pardon Mr. Scooter Libby. On my inauguration, I will rip Patrick Fitzgerald’s still-beating heart from his chest and take my oath of office with my hand resting on it – as will Vice President Libby.
shamanic pretends to take the “high road” – that only proves that she’s really running for vice president. But ask yourself if that’s the kind of person you can imagine grasping the pulsating heart of Patrick Fitzgerald, let alone tearing off slippery chunks of it with her teeth. I don’t think so.
[Note: Just playing to the base with this post, folks. I'll tack back toward the center once I've got the nomination in hand. Then I'll spend eight years taking care of my friends. Keep it on the downlow.]
Comment by Cernig —
July 2, 2007 @ 10:24 pm
I’m sure Libby would enjoy being the Fourth Branch, and she’s also a damn good co-blogger for us at Newshoggers. And astute move, Jim, trying to undermine Shamanic’s support by offering plum jobs to her cronies. I can only admire, as all Republican Machiavellians would, the underhanded adroitness of the tactic.
But your continued silence on the “mime” issue is undermining your support with the base. Sha will be tough on mimes and make them learn the words. If you continue to stand silent (like a mime…) then voters will draw their own conclusions.
Regards, “Uncle C” Rove.
Comment by David T —
July 2, 2007 @ 11:05 pm
Of course Bush did not pardon Libby. He commuted his sentence. If Libby had been pardoned, he could have been forced to testify, and could not have invoked the Fifth Amendment. But now he can say “I can’t testify because I still have a convction of a crime on appeal…” In short, far from being a “sensible compromise” between a pardon and letting the sentence stand, the commutation is *more* favorable than a pardon would be to Pres–I mean Vice-President Cheney.