In Memoriam
I worry that my previous post was edgy. I had the unfamiliar experience of crying at work today when people e-mailed me the news of Andrew’s death. Then I momentarily internalized Andrew’s injunction that “What I don’t want this to be is a chance for me, or anyone else, to be maudlin.” Now I’m starting to feel maudlin again. I don’t think the following counts as using Andrew’s death for “political purposes.” I apologize to anyone who concludes differently.
It being the 21st Century, Andrew and I never met in person. It was on our list of things to do. For awhile a couple years ago it looked like he was going to be rotating through the DC area but that fell through. His openness to changing his opinions humbled me, but I’m most impressed by his twin senses duty and play. Even as Andrew was coming to rue the Iraq War he was working very hard to get himself transferred in-theater. He held to the old and powerful idea of the social contract the soldier signs, as he explains in his posthumous blog entry.
At the same time, he felt a duty as a citizen entirely separate from his duty as a soldier. Hence, as soon as the Army forbade “Andrew Olmsted” to blog freelance, he donned the mask of G’Kar, the Pimpernel of milblogging. I like to think he did this partly because he believed in the importance of writing truly about what he saw and thought, but also because he just found blogging too much fun to give up. In addition to his writing at Obsidian Wings, he blogged as both G’Kar and Sheridan at All Alone in the Night, and he posted comments around the blogosphere, including here on UO. I wish I could get Wordpress to provide linkable search results to all his comments here, but I can’t. (He made major contributions to a thread on the size of the American military back in August. Scroll down from here.)
Andrew did me a very good turn in Spring 2004. He e-mailed that the blog read like bitterness was starting to consume me. Was I all right? Was it worth taking a step back and thinking about my tone? It was. He’s been my superego ever since. I’ve tried never to write anything I wouldn’t say to Andrew’s face. In the year or two before that, we had some genuine, short-lived blogspats. The reason these were short-lived is that Andrew worked to make them so. I owe him a lot that I’ll never be repaying now. I wish he was coming home alive.
Comment by Jon Henke —
January 4, 2008 @ 10:20 pm
Well said, Jim. The blogosphere was a better place for me because Andrew Olmsted was a part of it.
Comment by Leonard —
January 4, 2008 @ 10:33 pm
Google finds 5 comments by “G’Kar” on highclearing: here
There as also 8 by “Andrew Olmsted”.
Comment by Mary —
January 4, 2008 @ 10:39 pm
I never met or corresponded with Andrew, but I respected him greatly for his honesty and innate decency. What I’m just finding out today was how many bloggers I also respect, like you, felt so close to him, through rounds of conflict and reconciliation. I hope that his ability to be fully human and passionate, yet forgiving and openminded, comes to be recognized as part of his legacy.
Comment by Leonard —
January 4, 2008 @ 11:28 pm
His legacy… well, Olmsted asked that his death not be politicized. I can respect that to a degree but it still moves me to write something. I could go on about the tragedy here (in the old sense of the word), but that skates the edge.
What I will say is that his death, like that of Michael Kelly some years ago, brings this war home to me. A member of the chattering classes, I am almost completely insulated from the direct effects of the war. I don’t know anyone in Iraq or Afghanistan, nor have I known anyone who has been killed or wounded there. This is, I think, typical of American intellectuals. But via Olmsted’s blogging (as well as that many other military bloggers and Iraqi bloggers), I had some connection. A way to see into that world, surely, but also a little stake in it. And now I am hurt by this loss.
We live in a time of miracles, where I might debate a soldier half a world away over the fine points of BSG.
And that is one small ray of hope in this ugly grind. We can now interact directly, without mediation, with almost anyone in the world. Thus, I do hope, we can all come to see the world more clearly. To see war more clearly: that is what Olmsted was asking us to do in the latter part of his goodbye, which Mona posted here.
RIP muchacho.
Comment by Jim Henley —
January 4, 2008 @ 11:35 pm
BTW, if I manage to squeak out a posthumous post here – and may it never come to that – my one request is that any mourners fvcking lie instead of writing “I never heard of this blog before today but now I’m sad,” like so many people are doing on ObWi. If I were Andrew, I’d want people to profess to having read me with slavish devotion for years. That’s how you mourn a blogger!
Comment by Walter —
January 5, 2008 @ 12:49 am
I met Andrew in person. We Colorado bloggers tend to gather socially. Many tears.
Comment by foolishmortal —
January 5, 2008 @ 3:59 am
Although, in my defense, I think I batted a solid .250 or so
That man bat well over .500.
Comment by Lawrence Krubner —
January 5, 2008 @ 6:39 am
“I wish I could get Wordpress to provide linkable search results to all his comments here”
Did he always use the same name when leaving a comment? If so, then this is easy enough to arrange.
Comment by Jim Henley —
January 5, 2008 @ 8:50 am
Lawrence, all the G’Kar comments are under “G’Kar,” yeah.
Comment by Glaivester —
January 5, 2008 @ 9:45 am
Now I’m starting to feel maudlin again. I don’t think the following counts as using Andrew’s death for “political purposes.†I apologize to anyone who concludes differently.
Nope, nothing political here. It’s always sad when someone we know dies (particularly when they die young), and the world loses something by his death regardless of how one feels about the war in which he died.
Comment by Nell —
January 5, 2008 @ 10:07 am
I’ve been struggling since I learned the awful news (late, last night) to express what made Andrew so impressive, and one of the very best bloggers — and want to thank Mary for putting it so well:
I hope that his ability to be fully human and passionate, yet forgiving and openminded, comes to be recognized as part of his legacy.
He was a truly decent and honorable man, and a wonderful blogger. We’ll miss you forever, Andrew.
Comment by Eric Olmsted —
January 5, 2008 @ 10:59 am
Andy had so much respect for you Mr. Henley. I really think he would have laughed at the other post. He was a blogger.
Comment by Jim Henley —
January 5, 2008 @ 11:06 am
Thank you, Eric. That means a lot. I admired your brother enormously. I’ll always regret that we never met in person. My wife is deeply sorry too. Please know that our thoughts and prayers are with all of you this weekend.
Comment by Brian C.B. —
January 5, 2008 @ 1:30 pm
Jim, if you croak, I’ll remember you with, “His blog was my home page, you losers,” and “Sometimes I’d even forgo downloading porn just to visit UO.” Also, I’ll remember the lasting cultural contribution you made by authoring that “blog” post that racked up like, thousand comments. Also, that critique of Alec Rawls the-Flight-93-Memorial-is-really-a-mosque argument that attracted Alec Rawls himself to the thread so that the guy could make an even bigger fool of himself in the comments.
Wait. That was TBogg’s blog. Okay, maybe that wouldn’t be the right thing to do. OTOH, I can assume that no one will check.
Comment by Eric Niksch —
January 5, 2008 @ 2:13 pm
Eric Olmsted–
I was Andy’s last battalion commander at Carson. Please contact me at eric.niksch@xx.xxxx.xxx . The suffix is the same as Andy’s official Army e-mail.
Thanks,
Eric Niksch
Comment by defendusa —
January 5, 2008 @ 8:19 pm
Once again, I am cut down by the grief of Andrew’s friends. It is really rare that one finds a friend that can help you to see what you cannot and then help you to go up a notch,painlessly so. I still have that friend in my life and I am very lucky not to have lost friends in the war. It may come. I really and truly ache for his friends and family. It took guts to publish that letter and ya gotta love him all the more for having written it. Hang in there. And keep on blogging!!