The funeral will feature midgets dancing around a miniature Stonehenge
By Thoreau
Abu Laith al-Libi, the number 3 guy in Al Qaeda, met a fate similar to that of numerous other Al Qaeda number 3 guys and spontaneously combusted. (It actually happens all the time, it’s just not widely reported.)
Comment by Mark Z. —
January 31, 2008 @ 4:59 pm
It couldn’t have been al-Libi. He was elsewhere at the time.
Comment by Rhett —
January 31, 2008 @ 5:16 pm
In ancient times, hundreds of years before the dawn of history, an ancient race of people… the Druids. No one knows who they were or what they were doing…
Comment by kishnevi —
January 31, 2008 @ 6:45 pm
Why is it that we never kill numbers 4, 5, or 6? Is it only number 3 who goes outside the cave? If I were number 4, I would refuse the promotion. Or at least tell them to leave me my old number.
Comment by Thoreau —
January 31, 2008 @ 7:15 pm
If I were the number 4, I’d reject a promotion to 3 on the grounds that 4 is one better.
Comment by joe —
January 31, 2008 @ 9:17 pm
According to the al Qaeda charter, there are three constitutional offices; Mastermind, Vice-Mastermind, and Keeper of the GPS Transmitter.
Comment by wade —
February 1, 2008 @ 4:35 am
al libi is described in the article as a “mid level” member of al quaeda. If he is mid level, and also the number three guy, and we assume that on each level there are twice the number of guys than in the level above, then that means there is only one level below him, consisting of four guys. So theres only six jihadis left to kill and we’ve won the war on terror.
Comment by matthew hogan —
February 1, 2008 @ 6:25 am
They’ve given him a number and taken away his name.
Comment by Barry —
February 1, 2008 @ 8:58 am
And his life.
Comment by Thoreau —
February 1, 2008 @ 11:26 am
Descriptions vary as to whether he was mid level or number 3.
All I know is that every Al Qaeda person ever killed has been the #3 guy in Al Qaeda. It’s like drumming for Spinal Tap.