Population Density Increases in Hell
Jesse Helms begins a car-free lifestyle – er, deathstyle – in Satan’s arcology. They say you should speak no ill of the dead, and indeed, with dead Jesse Helms I have no beef. The living Jesse Helms was one of the most loathsome figures in American history, of whom the world is well-rid. Hasta la vista, you son of a bitch.
Comment by abb1 —
July 4, 2008 @ 12:49 pm
Hasta la vista? You expect to end up in the same place?
Comment by Ian —
July 4, 2008 @ 3:59 pm
Helms was known to start whistling “Dixie” while standing next to Senator Carol Moseley-Braun. Join with me in whistling the Battle Hymn of the Republic over his grave.
Comment by Avram —
July 4, 2008 @ 5:10 pm
Tonight, the nation will celebrate with fireworks and barbecue feasts.
Comment by bains —
July 4, 2008 @ 7:38 pm
stay classy Jim.
Comment by Neel Krishnaswami —
July 4, 2008 @ 9:52 pm
abb1: My dad was a religious Hindu and an engineer, and so saw that a) there were religiously prescribed karmas we had to perform, and b) we weren’t performing them. Therefore, he told me and my brother when we were kids that we — me, him, my mother and my brother — would all go to hell when we died, to expurgate our sins before we reincarnated.
Oddly enough, as a child I don’t recall finding this a particularly frightening or off-putting doctrine. I think the complete absence of any special pleading in his account made it seem plausible to me.
Comment by Anon —
July 5, 2008 @ 1:44 am
First Larry Harmon, now Jesse Helms. Who’ll be number three?
Anon
Comment by Timothy —
July 5, 2008 @ 2:18 am
Good fucking riddance. It’s too bad he went comfortably and at a ripe old age, I suppose there really is no such thing as justice.
Comment by Kevin Hayden —
July 5, 2008 @ 4:11 am
I would gladly surrender my agnosticism were I assured Helms would spend eternity at that new address preferably as an appetizer for Idi Amin.
Comment by abb1 —
July 5, 2008 @ 9:58 am
Neel, suppose you’re going to the Hindu Hell, and Jim to his Left-Libertarian-Atheist Hell (or whatever) – what’s the chance of either of you ever running into Jesse in there? Surely he must be in a Hell a billion light-years away.
Comment by Neel Krishnaswami —
July 5, 2008 @ 1:44 pm
Following Sartre, Hell is other people — I’d certainly consider being locked in a room with Jesse Helms an infernal experience, and Jim likely would too….
Comment by bbartlog —
July 5, 2008 @ 11:31 pm
You’ve reminded me of why I don’t like liberals. Presented with a perfectly reasonable taboo against speaking ill of the recently deceased, you specifically choose to transgress it as a cheap way of emphasizing your liberal cred.
I’m also reminded of the thinness of actual goodwill to other human beings on the liberal side. Goodwill towards victims is easy, but sympathy for your political demons is too big a reach for you.
Personally I hope Helms finds peaceful rest, as I do for anyone (including many who were worse than he was).
Comment by Jim Henley —
July 5, 2008 @ 11:40 pm
Glad I was able to provide you an excuse to feel superior, bb.
Comment by ari —
July 6, 2008 @ 2:56 am
many who were worse than he was
Really? You know “many” such people? I suppose this is what comes of hanging out amongst conservative.
Comment by abb1 —
July 6, 2008 @ 5:19 am
Interesting. I never thought of American anti-liberals (Rush Limbaugh-types?) as proponents of PC-style taboos like “de mortuis nil nisi bonum”.
I thought they despise the PC bullshit and proudly say exactly what they think. Though, I noticed, mostly about the victims.
Speaking ill about the powerful dead is more tasteless? I have to think about this one.
Comment by Barry —
July 6, 2008 @ 8:41 am
To a right-winger, abb1, speaking ill of the more powerful dead is indeed more tasteless, because they expect to number them among the right.
Comment by bbartlog —
July 6, 2008 @ 10:12 am
By way of contrast, here’s some right-wing reaction to Ted Kennedy’s brain tumor: link.
A sad day when apologists for waterboarding and the Iraq war show you up. And for what it’s worth you are right on the issues far more often than they are.
Comment by Jim Henley —
July 6, 2008 @ 10:27 am
boris, I think we both know that there were right-wingers out there who were very ungracious for publication about Kennedy’s brain tumor. What’s more, I do not begrudge them that. If, for instance, you think Ted Kennedy got away with negligent homicide because of his connections – I do, for one – then there’s no reason for you to stop hating him for that just because he’s sick.
Comment by Donald Johnson —
July 6, 2008 @ 12:58 pm
There is something to be said for the “God have mercy on us all” mindset. Actually, there’s lots to be said for it.
What I object to in the “speak no evil of the powerful dead” is that the moment is usually used to tell all sorts of patriotically correct lies about both the departed and past US history. Nothing about death squads and Reagan when he died, nothing about Ford and East Timor at his demise, but all sorts of things about what great men they were, leading us in the fight for freedom or (in Ford’s case) uniting us (by ensuring that a powerful man not have to face justice in court).
If people just want to talk about how kind the person was in their private lives and left all politics out of it for a week until they were in the ground, I’d go along with that.
Comment by Donald Johnson —
July 6, 2008 @ 12:59 pm
” how kind the person was in their private lives ”
No one should talk about my mangled syntax when I kick off. I’m just saying.
Comment by Barry —
July 6, 2008 @ 1:40 pm
Donald, even that’s a bit much. I’ve had my fill of ‘he’s a nice guy’ used as a defense of nasty scum. I don’t care if he always took the time to tuck his kids in to bed, no matter how long he worked that day, if his work that day was evil.
Comment by Mona —
July 6, 2008 @ 5:07 pm
bains is a Republican “libertarian” who would not criticize anyone from his party, except from the right. Helms is entirely up his alley, so that’s why he thinks Jim ain’t “classy.”
Comment by joe —
July 6, 2008 @ 6:24 pm
That’s a real shame.
I was looking forward to Jesse Helms watching the inauguration of the first black president.
Comment by Donald Johnson —
July 6, 2008 @ 10:18 pm
Barry–
I haven’t practiced what I just preached. Quite the opposite. I’m just willing to speak nothing substantive at all about the departed for a week or so, so long as I don’t have to hear what a wonderful leader the late so-and-so was. Of course it won’t work that way, so all bets are off as far as I am concerned.