Unqualified Offerings

Looking Sideways at Your World Since October 2001

Archive for December, 2009

Sunday, December 27th, 2009

Achtung!

By Thoreau
My fellow proleterians, our benevolent comrades in the Ministry for State Security are pleased to announce that passengers on flights entering the US can  no longer use the bathroom or have anything on their laps (except a spreading pee stain) during the last hour of flight.  This is for our own good, and only [...]

Sunday, December 27th, 2009

Burn Notice

By Thoreau
I’m a few episodes into Burn Notice, and I’m finding myself entertained.  I just finished the episode that ends with Michael meeting another spy at his father’s grave.  The first rule of spy dramas seems to be that when a spy visits the grave of an estranged father we eventually learn that the father [...]

Saturday, December 26th, 2009

subordinates envious colleagues unfavourable winds

The War on Christmas, with maps.

Saturday, December 26th, 2009

More on the swarthy threat to our precious carry-on fluids

By Thoreau
1)  If anybody wants to racially profile in response to this, rest assured that our law enforcement agencies are already well-prepared to profile people who look similar to Nigerians.  In fact, many law enforcement agencies have been pre-emptively profiling people who look similar to Nigerians for some time.  They’re totally ahead of the curve [...]

Saturday, December 26th, 2009

Our precious carry-on fluids

By Thoreau
Although details are all preliminary, it appears that a terrorist did indeed try to blow up an airplane and harm a number of people equal to several Afghan wedding parties.  A few facts to keep in mind:
1)  Whatever it is that he did or tried to do, he didn’t hurt anybody other than himself.  [...]

Friday, December 25th, 2009

Belated plug for a friend

By Thoreau
A good friend of mine has an ebusiness, selling all sorts of good stuff that he gets from wholesalers, but especially consumer electronics.  I completely forgot to put in a plug for it during the Christmas shopping season, and I feel awful about that, but better late than never.  I bought a Christmas gift [...]

Friday, December 25th, 2009

Merry Christmas, Babies

To all who celebrate it. I am about to drag Beatles Rock Band Special Edition in from the car and explore "pseudo-rapping" options. It’s the year’s whole-family present. Let history show that by the end of the first decade of the 21st Century, the kids of America loved, more than any other musicians, Michael Jackson [...]

Thursday, December 24th, 2009

Three wise physicists from the east, bearing precious metals and gifts: Aluminum tubes, uranium ore, and heavy water

By Thoreau
And so it came to pass that in the first year of the reign of Barack Augustus, who succeeded George the Lesser, there was a great turmoil in Persia.  But even in the turmoil were the magi spared, for they knew the secrets of transmuting one unstable element to another.  The Persians, who knew [...]

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

I don’t watch sports, but…

By Thoreau
I agree with Comrade Physioprof on this regarding Teh Troops, aggrandized as the ultimate defenders of Freedom, whatever freedom means these days.

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009

Toking Toward Gomorrha

By Mona
According to one Mary Grabar — a Ph.D in English posting at PajamasMedia — Western civilization literally depends on pot prohibition. Hence, Libertarians Need to Rethink Support for Drug Legalization:
Marijuana . . .has always been counter-cultural in the West. Every toke symbolizes a thumb in the eye of Western values. So it [...]